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It is only June, but it has been a year for the books. Not only for everything and every one around the world but in out little family also. The kids and Brad have loved living in Boise. Even though not much is open to do, it's still been nice. Since April, nothing has felt like home for me. When we moved out of our house in 2018 and closed in 2019, we have been in limbo. We didn't have a house or our own, we had a plan, and we were waiting for 2020 to make that happen. Then the world stopped. We still moved in April, but we were unsure if the kids would go back to school, so I didn't commit to any job, I couldn't leave the kids in Twin alone if they went back and Brad and I were working in Boise. We found out a few weeks (maybe a month) after we moved that school was canceled. I started to look for jobs, but the next Monday we all got word that due to COVID, St Luke's was stopping all hiring for the time being. We had hoped that it would only be till mid May, so we stuck it out. I really do like working for St Luke's and didn't want to leave. The farther and farther we got into me traveling, the harder it got. I left for Meridian home Thursday, usually after lunch. I had amazing coworkers who made it possible I could do that. Then I'd be there and leave to Twin home Sunday about 7 pm. It was hard to be fully happy or into either place. Twin I was without my husband and kids, I had my parents and work friends, who I love, but I was looking forward to Meridian home. I went to Meridian and it was hard to fully relax because I knew my time there was short and I just had to leave again. Monday's were my hardest days, it was a steps of acceptance each week. Monday was depression. I didn't want to be working, but I also felt I needed to be grateful for the job I had, so many aren't that lucky right now. Tuesday was anger, why me? Why do I keep doing this, is it worth it. Wednesday was okay I'm here, deal with it, you're fine. Thursday to Saturday was happy. I was going Meridian home/home. Sunday was numb, really the only word I can think. I knew what was coming, the kids did to and it was hard to focus on anything else for me. I did this 20 times. A few times kids came to Twin home with me, and the last time everyone came as well. It never got easier to do. I hated hearing the most was people telling me they don't know how I do it, they never could. I didn't because I wanted to, I did it because I needed to. With the world right now, I felt lucky to have work. And one day we will be back to normal, and I'll be just as lucky to still have a job. I loved my time with my parents though. I was torn. I knew that once I did get a job in Boise/Meridian, my chapter in Twin Falls would be closed. I'd no longer live in Twin at all. 

This brings us to June 1. Brad and I talked a lot about our situation and how to handle it. We had heard that week that St Luke's is on hold till at least August, which would mean a lot longer traveling. I went in that Monday and talked to my manager. She knew it was coming so it  wasn't a surprise, but I let her know, June 18th I will be taking a personal leave of absence. I can name a million reasons why, to justify why, but none matter, I was just over limbo. August 2018 to June 2020 is long enough. She told me the end of that day to wait a little bit before I sign the papers. Tuesday afternoon she called me and asked if I'd be willing to do full time and the job would be from home. I said yeah, I don't really mind at all now, I'm just needing something. She was talking with another manager, who interviewed me previously about a position in Meridian that is open. She was going to send a float (a person who just goes from department to department as needed) to infusion scheduling, but she would be willing to send me as a 'float' and send a float in my place. I didn't hear anything Wednesday or Thursday. I was leaving early that day as normal, so I was nervous I didn't get anything done all week. It was our 15 year anniversary that night, which Brad and I celebrated. The next morning I got a text that asked me to check my work emails. When I did I saw the email that asked if I would take this spot and oh you start Monday 8 am. (as long as my manager was okay with it) I cried with relief. The kids were a little worried so I tried to explain it was tears of happiness and not being sad. I didn't have to go back to Twin Sunday night. I took the job not knowing at all what I did, other than some sort of scheduling. My manager was okay with it, so I was good to go.

The office is about 10 minutes away from out house, and really hasn't been bad. I've been training since then and I think I'm getting it. 

 With staring a job so fast, there were a few things left in Twin that I needed to get. This past weekend we had family plans, so we were going anyways. I had to go to my old office and get a few things. I sat at my desk one last time. It's not the same Sunday without anyone there. It feels a little empty leaving that job. I liked the people I worked with, and I didn't get to say goodbye to any of them. 

We had a fun family BBQ. My brother from Mississippi was down, so all but one grand kid was there. Which is is not easy getting them all to look at you, at the same time and making a decent face, but it's a good looking bunch.

I packed up the room that I was staying in and we headed for our new home town. It was much harder than I thought saying goodbye, and really goodbye for the last time. We we come back it won't be to our home, it will be to visit. It was hardest to say bye to my parents. I will see them again, but over the last 2 years especially, they have done so much for me and my family. They gave up most of their house for my family. I'm thankful everyday for all they did and saying goodbye until next time, not goodbye until Monday, or tomorrow after work was much harder than I ever thought it would be.

Twin Falls is my home, I liked all but 9 months of my life there and I love it there. The whole time traveling, I didn't let any place become my home. I wasn't settled. I wish I could say I am now, I came here and it was poof perfect. But it's not. I'm still trying to figure out how this big busy city will be our home. How me, Kilie- nervous- scared to meet people let alone talk to any one- doesn't like change or leaving my comfort zone Kilie, can do this. One thing I have known and held onto this whole time is that this is right. I wasn't sure about Boise at first, and it took a little bit for me to know it was right. Once I did, I felt guided the whole time. I had to keep the faith and keep believing that the 'perfect for me' job would come along. That I didn't travel 2,738 miles over 2.5 months for nothing. That a path was being set up for me and my family. I know someday we will look back and think 'ahhh that's why it went this way', I already can many other things, until then, I will work slowly at making Meridian our home,  a place that one day when our kids grow up and leave, they will be torn to do as well, but have many happy memories to take with them.